Ok, who out there really knows how to tell your lover what you want?  How you want to be touched, what you want to feel?  If you’ve got that down, by all means move on to the next subject.  But, if you’ve ever been shy or felt uncomfortable talking about what feels good, then this is for you.

There’s a bit of a stigma around talking dirty.  Around sexuality itself, for that matter.  And then we wonder why we aren’t satisfied.  Well, the good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way.  We don’t have to lock away our desires and hide them from our lover.  We can actually open up and talk about what turns us on.  And, if you’ve been a little shy, no worries.  There’s no time like the present.

Sometimes we keep quiet because we’re afraid of being judged.  Maybe we’ve been taught to judge ourselves.  To think it’s not right for us to want to be pleased and tell our lover what that looks like, what we imagine it might.  The truth of the matter is that sometimes we learn the wrong lessons, and that’s one of them.  It’s not wrong to talk about our desires.  In fact, it couldn’t be more right.

How do you feel when your lover tells you what they like?  Does it get you excited?  Bring in a little tingle, a bit of warmth in your belly and deeper?  It’s juicy and enticing to have a lover tell us what really gets them going.  And our lover feels the same way about hearing it from us.  Man or woman, it doesn’t matter.  Touch me here, slide your tongue along me like that, let me feel you in this position…  This is hot!  It’s a way to unapologetically embrace our desires and invite a depth of passion.

And you don’t have to wait for things to get hot and heavy first.  You may want to practice in those sexy moments, getting closer and sharing a kiss or a nuzzle.  Whisper a little desire in your lover’s ear.  Share about a sensual experience you’d like to have.  Talk about what revs your engine, and see how your lover responds.  You might get a bit of surprise, but I can guarantee it won’t be disappointment.  In fact, this can be the key to bringing your connection to a juicier, more exquisite level than you’ve ever felt before.  Try it once, and you’ll find that you want to talk about those sexy little thoughts again the next time.  This is a way to drive your lover wild before you even reach the bedroom.

So, have a think about it.  What do you want?  Sensual massage?  A little bit of bondage?  How can you share your desires to inspire passion and delicious connection?  Maybe challenge yourself to say it in the moment, when it really counts.  Let yourself talk a bit dirty, and see what happens.  There’s no way you’ll want to get shy again after your lover shows you what it means to them to hear you.

Wishing you some deliciously naughty moments in this holiday season,

Taranga