Just the other day, I watched a man in my local cafe gazing longingly at his female companion’s’ rather prominent nipples during conversation. We’ve all been there eh, girls… that awkward feeling as you realise his eyes are focused a good few inches below where they should be. Hey fellas… last time I checked, it was the eyes that were the windows to the soul, not the boobs!
All joking aside, in that moment, I realised what visual creatures a lot of men are. But when it comes to using our sense of sight, touch, taste, sound and smell, you might be surprised to learn that most of us rely on one of our five senses much more than the others.
Here’s the trick: if we can figure out whether we’re more motivated by touch than sight, or taste than sound, that understanding can really help us in our sex lives. So here’s a fun test to help you figure out your own sensory preference! Try to picture in your head the following situations or scenarios, and pay attention to how easy or difficult it is to conjure them up.
Touch: Rolling around naked on a fur rug. Diving into a cool pool on a hot day. Running your hands along smooth, soft, warm skin. Pulling on a cold wetsuit.
Taste: Biting into a still-warm chocolate croissant. Swallowing a mouthful of ocean. Sucking a lemon wedge. Sipping a glass of crisp white wine.
Sound: Hearing birds singing and the wind in the trees. Listening to waves crashing. Hearing your lover talk dirty. A car alarm outside your front door.
Smell: The aromas in your favourite café. The scent of a bunch of lilies. Wood smoke on a crisp autumn afternoon. Burning rubber from a screeching tire.
Sight: The view from Sydney harbour bridge. Your favourite movie star naked on your bed. The night sky lit up by stars. The inside of the last bar you visited.
Whichever category came most easily to mind or triggered the strongest reaction is the one you’re primarily motivated by. And once you’re more aware of what most triggers your sensual reactions, you can start asking for more of the stuff that REALLY gets you excited.
Try this exercise on a friend or lover. Once you’ve figured out their main turn-ons, you’ll be able to connect with them on a whole new level. Get creative and figure out some unusual, surprising or cute ways to appeal to their primary sense preference. That way you won’t be wasting your cash on a bunch of flowers when they’d really rather have you tickle them all over with an ostrich feather!