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Why I Use a Live Male Model for the Hens Party

May 012017

I love offering workshops around sexuality.  It’s deeply fulfilling to share about how to create passionate, powerful sexual experiences, and I really enjoy getting up in front of a group to teach about all aspects of sexuality and sensual connection.  Being a sex educator, I’m always expanding my repertoire, exploring new ways to reach my audience and offer them new ways to learn about pleasure.  One beautiful way that I do this is by demonstration with a live male model. I offer Hens Parties in Sydney during which I showcase a lingam massage live and in person. There’s something about working in person and live for all to see that you simply can’t match any other way.

When I’m working with a live model, I’m able to show specific techniques, subtleties and refinements.  Plenty can be passed across with words, but when you see the technique in action, it opens up a whole new layer of understanding.  Instead of simply following a description, the audience has seen the process, been a part of it.  They gain a greater understanding and retain more of what’s been passed along in the workshop.  It’s just like any class in that respect, whether we’re discussing tantra or sewing; a skilled teacher can help students to learn a subject through lectures alone, but if they can actually see what you mean, they will learn a lot more.

One of the most rewarding things about working with a live model is that I am able to show how to touch consciously, with care, sensitivity, and intention.  A touch is worth a thousand words.  I can write or talk about going slowly with a lingam massage, or using light pressure in certain touches, certain parts of the process, but through demonstration, the audience gets a sense of what that actually means.  How to tune in with the receiver, the power of subtle touches.

I also show how to maintain constant contact with the model, not only through touch but through voice as well.  I check in with them regularly throughout the workshop, tuning in and receiving feedback.  Not only does this give the participants an opportunity to ask questions and receive feedback from the model while in the state, it also shows how they can bring this same kind of openness, communication, and conscious connection into the bedroom.  Time and time again I’ve had my audiences share that, in observing me, how I work with the model, they have picked up new ways of connecting with their lover, holding the space, and sharing sensuality. I love offering these tantra hens parties because I can pass along skills and knowledge that transform the womens love lives from then on.

People learn in different ways.  Some are more auditory and learn well simply by hearing me discuss the process, while others learn better when reading about the technique.  Some absorb the information well just by watching, and others need to engage in the process, taking notes or actually trying it out themselves.  Knowing this, I offer handouts with a written description and pens to take notes.  When working with a live model, you can see what is happening when he is touched in certain ways.  It takes the workshop out of the realm of theory and brings it home for the participants.

One of the things that I’ve heard from the participants many times after the workshops is that seeing how I work has given them permission to be less goal-oriented in their own sexual adventures.  I love this, because it’s really the whole point of tantra.  It helps us to move past the tendency to go through the motions and opens up a new level of sensual connection, really feeling and being present to the sensations.  And once again, though I can explain the importance of this to the audience, once they see it, it becomes more clear. These workshops are a great idea for a truly unique Hens Night, a chance to prepare the lucky lady for passionate and sensual years ahead.

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